Tuesday, 13 August 2013

Egypt

Egypt is most likely the world's oldest civilization having appeared from the Nile Valley around 3,100 BC, in the past. Egypt is perhaps one of the oldest vacation spots. Early Greeks, Romans and others went there just for fun, and to see the wonders of some of mankind's earliest victories. But Egypt is much more than Pyramids and monuments. 

It is also hot night spots, Red Sea scuba diving, luxury hotels, and five star restaurants. It is romantic cruises down the Nile on festive river boats, a night at the grand opera and it is an enriching experience like none you have ever experienced. Egypt is a land full of life with sound, excitement, visual beauty and sound. More than everything else, we want you to think of Egypt as fun.

Tuesday, 5 March 2013

Limón

Puerto Limón, commonly known as Limón is the capital city and main hub of Limón province, as well as of the canton of Limón in Costa Rica. It has a population of about 60,000, and is home to a thriving Afro-Caribbean community. Part of the community traces its roots to Jamaican laborers who worked on a late nineteenth-century railroad project that connected San José to Puerto Limón. Other parts of the population trace their roots to the Nicaraguan, Panamanian, and Colombian turtle-hunters who eventually settled along the Province of Limón's coast.

Until 1948, the Costa Rican government did not recognize Afro-Caribbean people as citizens and restricted their movement outside Limón province. As a result of this "travel ban", this Afro-Caribbean population became firmly established in the region, which influenced the decision to not move even after it was legally permitted. The Afro-Caribbean community speaks Spanish and Limonese Creole, a creole of English. Puerto Limón contains two port terminals, Limón and Moín, which permit the shipment of Costa Rican exports as well as the anchoring of cruise ships. Health care is provided for the city by Hospital Dr. Tony Facio Castro. Two small islands, Uvita Island and Isla de Pájaros, are just offshore.

Tuesday, 31 January 2006

Okay, Here's the Plan

I've always wanted a job where I showed up for about five minutes on a Sunday evening. During that five minutes, I would be asked to bitch about some aspect of life; preferably, I would bemoan the passing of time and be unreasonably pissed off about the ways of the young people. My appearance wouldn't matter at all, so I could grow my eyebrows out to inhuman and unwieldy proportions. This job exists, people, and he's going to retire sooner or later. I'm preparing my resume.

Monday, 30 January 2006

Hair Redux (Again)

There is blending! And scalp coverage!

Thanks for all your nice comments which I pretty much forced you to say. Still, I appreciate the support in my hour of need.

I giggled every time somebody said it was funky because I'm so un-funky. Funky for me is wearing a twin-set...that isn't grey!

Friday, 27 January 2006

Red Is the New Brown

I just allowed my racist hairstylist (yes, I still visit her--we've reached a compromise: she makes bigoted comments and then I get to interrogate her about why she believes the things she says) to put red stripey highlights in my hair.

I can't decide if I look hella cool or like a college professor with red stripes in her hair. I caught someone staring at me in the grocery store, but that might have been because I walked up to the meat counter and announced in my microphone voice, "PLEASE GIVE ME FIFTEEN TO TWENTY DE-VEINED SHRIMP." And then I repeated "deveined" 9,000 more times just to show off to the old woman in the motorized Shopping Weasel that I know it's not dev-vee-end. Duh. Do you think I'm stupid, Lady?

I haven't gotten much work done because I've just photographed my hair from multiple angles and then texted pictures to everyone I know with the message, "Do I look like ass?" So far, I've only received a response from my mom who called to say, "I saw someone with red-striped hair on American Idol," which, of course, does nothing to answer the fundamental question: do I need to shave my head now?

Seriously, I'm sure I would have a successful scholarly publishing record if I were bald. Instead, I have three unfinished articles; nine ungraded papers; one unplanned class; and forty gatrillion unanswered emails. And my hair is still red-striped.

Gah.

Saturday, 21 January 2006

Update

A whole lotta nothing going on around here. Go to school. Come home. Go to school. That pretty much sums it up. What's up with these lucky bastards who are still on break?

I'm going to a conference in two weeks, and I haven't written one single word for my presentation yet. Is that bad?

I've been watching trash TV while I exercise which means I'll stay on the elliptical until my legs burn. I eat brownies to help rejuvenate myself.

I'm supposed to attend a HUGE, INCREDIBLE, IMPORTANT social function this weekend, but I'd rather stay home and exchange misanthropic banter with Awesome Man. Please vote on the best excuse for my absence:

* Snake bite
* Menopause
* Old lacrosse injury acting up
* Surprise IRS audit
* AM having affair with local news anchor

I step-parented today. Usually I suck at being a step-parent, but I was pretty okay at it today. When AM's daughter asked me what I would do in a particular situation if I were the mom, I said, "I'd ask my mom because she's better at this kind of thing." I think my honesty underscored my complete ineptitude, thus signaling that parenting questions ought to be directed to those more qualified than me. Fortunately, I get to act as the mediator. I find out what her mom thinks about something and then I find out what her dad thinks about something, and I just reinforce those messages. If I had to come up with the messages on my own, though, I'd be lost. I make a somewhat acceptable role model in that I don't have an arrest record and I've never snorted coke off of a hooker, but I would be a horrible parent. Case-in-point: I recognize my nephew's birthday every third year, except for the five years that I just forgot altogether.

For the good of humanity, I'm now going to take a shower and wash my hair.

Friday, 6 January 2006

Seriously, the World Needs More Valets

If you know me in real life, then you know that lack of parking used to be my kryptonite. My dream job (right after professional book recommender) would be professional parking lot assigner. Nothing would please me more than being able to place name tags on parking spaces across the country. It doesn't make sense to me that one goes to the grocery store and one parks wherever one feels like parking. Assigned parking would solve a lot of the world's problems.

The fact that I can't park at work would have been like exposing Superman to gold kryptonite had I not found the antidote to my parking weakness: my employer has provided a satellite parking lot with plenty of parking spaces and a shuttle bus. Everyone who knows me in real life knows that my third dream job is shuttle bus driver (with an assistant who parks it at the end of my shift).

The subject of parking stress arose again in my household when Awesome Man's employer, Ass-Clowns-R-Us, decreed that nobody could park in the parking lot anymore. And then the city said that nobody could park on the street anymore. (Keep in mind that we live in a city that provides the world's worst public transportation. Buses run about once every five hours and only to places that you don't want to go. Trains run from downtown to the outlying suburbs, but unless you happen to live and work directly on that line, you are screwed.)

One of the things I love about AM is that he's willing to get worked up over parking. In fact, I'm going to IM him right now and ask him if the world should have assigned parking. I bet he'll say, "Hells yes!" Let's see. Hold on.

Damn it. He said, "Maybe." Well, under normal circumstances, he would agree on the parking issue. After further discussion, he did agree to assigned parking...based on an IQ test.

But back to the issue at hand. AM's employer, Ass-Clowns-R-Us, created a braintrust to solve this parking dilemma. Employees can't park in the lot because it's owned by another company and the lot isn't big enough for everyone. Hence, the other company gave Ass-Clowns-R-Us a set number of spaces, but not enough for all employees. How do you suppose the brain trust solved this problem?

That's right. Valets. They hired valets. When AM arrives at work, he is supposed to pull up to the front of the building and give his keys to the valets. The valets will also retrieve AM's car, but only if he leaves by four pm. And he never leaves by four. So he has to ask security to get his keys and then wander around the parking lot to see where the valet has placed his car.

Let me summarize this situation for you in case you are missing something: because there are too many cars for the number of parking spaces allotted to the company, they hired valets to park the cars. Go ahead. See if you can figure out the problem with this solution.

I guess the moral of the story is that the world needs more valets because they are problem-solvers. They are kryptonite fighters. Heroes, I say!

I think we should send them to the Middle East next.